just another post

Today's been a really good day, I ate 4 rice crackers, papaya (lots of it) and 2 rice cakes with cottage cheese, it came to 226calories for the day and did some weights and played boxing on wii for 30mins, I actually started sweating playing wii.

I went shopping with mum and bought a few safe foods, you know what annoys me? every time I get healthy stuff that mum usually wont buy, so you'd probably never see it in the fridge if it wasnt for me but every time I get low cal snacks, good fruit (nothing boring like apples and bananas stuff like strawberries and blueberries and watermelon or papaya) rice crackers or lite sugar free jelly,cottage cheese etc thats supposed to be FOR ME!! it gets eaten buy everybody else in the house and even though I have my own shelf in the fridge do you think people take note of that? if I write my name on containers it wont help either. it is sooo annoying so I've had to hide my rice cakes in my room which sucks cause my room is supposed to be my food free zone but if people are just going to eat all my food, what will be left for me to eat? sweets?chocolate?chips?ice cream? i dont think so!! even when I get mum to start buying things for salads, guess what the rest of the family wants too..salad! it drives me up the wall!

I miss B his only been gone 3 days and he said he might only come back home on Saturday :( I hate his job sometimes. I cant wait for my parents to go to Hamilton Island next Friday :) few months ago they went to Tasmania for a week and B stayed over (they dont know that tho)it was so good, I wish we could have our own place.
The other couple my parents are going with has a son a year older than me I think and he wants to have a massive party on one of the nights, B wants to go... I'm still thinking bout it! I cant believe how anti-social I've become since all of this, I'm so scared of drinking now, i dont smoke weed anymore because of the munchies, I hate going out to eat at restaurants if my friends have McDonald's I just have to sit there and smell it all, sometimes i think ew how can you eat that crap but sometimes I think OMG I want some of it! I never get anything when I go to the movies anymore, I always make up excuses to avoid going clubbing..wow typing it all out just made it sound 100 times worse, well that sucks..hmm anyway I need to make a shopping list of food i want for that week or else she'll be flooding the fridge with pre packaged meals and lotsa soft drink and the usual junk in the pantry, actually she has noticed a change in my eating so hopefully she wont buy crap, im still making a list either way gotta think of stuff for B too seeing that he'll be living here for that week.

My current weight is 75.9Kgs :) almost at my first GW thats exciting! I dont think I'm going to reward myself though, its taken me way too long to get to it so I dot think I deserve a reward I was supposed to be at this weight 2 almost 3 weeks ago, that's my punishment for all the unnecessary binging.
I'm off to bed its 1:15am I'm going shopping with mum & Tina in the morning for God knows what, I hope we dont end up having lunch at a restaurant or anything if mum insists on buying me clothes again I intend to buy things that are too small for me, i think it looks weird cause she's been asking me if I wanted to go clothes shopping 3 times now and I said no which is not like me at all so smaller sizes and more motivation cant kill me!