ok so eventually dinner time would come around and i would need to eat infront of my family.. mum made chicken, brocoli and salad thank god there was something i could eat, mum threw 2 pieces of chicken drumsticks in my plate and i said i was good i unwillingly scrapped about a cupful of salad into my plate and 3 little branches of brocoli, YUCK! I felt llike such a failure already and I hadent even started then i slowly placed the brocoli in my mouth squishy..soft..gross i finished it and thought: that must be enough but i couldnt get up and leave, i ate my salad it was ok the only good thing on that plate, finished.. chicken.. gross eww spicy chicken i stared at it and thought of how that poor chicken had a life lol what an idiot i sound like right now anyway i took a bite and felt like spitting it out asap i could feel its fatty oily juices run through me like a disease i thought of dead chickens in filthy cages, blood everywhere..just about to throw up now i finished the first drumstick worst tasting chicken ever took a bite of the second one but i decided i was full so i left it.
i chugged glasses of juice down my throat to fill me up and then thought about the sugar content in those glasses the mango orange taste probably disgusting artificial flavour.. all the flavour enhances and that syrup produced with the hundreds of packets of sugar, i thought about how long this juice has been on the shelf, i thought about how long the juice has been n the factory before hitting the shelf, i thought about.. what if the mixes or whatever in that factory never gets cleaned i stoped no more juice YUCK! dinner was over for me i felt sick i need to get rid of it now..
Mum: can you load the dishwasher for me please but finish your chicken first its alright
Me: er.. its ok il do it now
Mum: no finish your dinner not everyones done eating anyway
Me: k
last piece of chicken.. down it goes, all of it. i need to throw up i wanted to throw up i feel sick im such a pig ew ew ew
Losing weight has become my number one priority, its all I care about, its all I want,Its all I need... is to be skinny
My progress...
Thanks for commenting and following. I know, nice to see some kg's out there too :P :) xx
ReplyDeletelol yea no problem :) i just finished reading your entire blog and i love that losertown website too you thinspo is great.
ReplyDeleteHey hunnie, Glad you like my blog. You remind me of me. When I first follow someone I start to read through most of their old post to get a feel for them.
ReplyDeleteSounds like your ready to become a vegetarian.. Its also easy for you to avoid eating and helps you to make your own food, then you can avoid family meals completely like by only making your food when they have stated to eat. Plus most veg practically all are negative calories (this means they burn - through digestion - the same amount of calories that the food contains).
I will be reading through your old posts, but not now..later today as I am with my parents. Mind you they can't see the screen.
good luck hun
x
ohok cool, theres not much as i only just started hehe, thats a good idea what u said about avoiding eating meals with family i might do that. thanks
ReplyDeletexoxo
your welcome.
ReplyDeletex